Weekend- Reminder of my Infertility

What did I do over the weekend?

weekend post

Friday:

How about starting the weekend with pamper time? I did just that, prepping for it from the afternoon at work itself. I fall into the sponsored ads with the greed of getting more by paying less. I booked an appointment on the online beauty parlour.

Firstly, I waited and waited for an hour. 2 beauticians assigned for me but both in hurry to complete their respective task (neither of them done it perfectly). My previously well-cut styled hair got ruined (nothing ‘creative hair cut’). Facial and pedicure wrapped up in half hour with no relax feeling.

spa pedicure big stylist

spa pedicure

Lesson learned: Never book an appointment with the company again.

(It would have been much better I did it by myself as I do it often, but I would like to try UrbanClap once due to their good reviews)

Saturday:

H surprised me by telling ‘how about visiting to your moms’ place?’ I was over the moon but I did not reveal it 😉

We travelled via Mumbai local train (as usual). Needless to say they are overcrowded but still I like them. They are the part of my teen life and 20’s.

I love these ballerinas from honey. A gift from H on our second wedding anniversary (2014), the only anniversary we celebrated which eventually did not turn out good (many reasons not to celebrate).

Moms place = No work = Relaxation = Ready Cooked Food

IMG_20170304_182013

Sev Puri: My one of the favourite Indian chat from many

Sunday:

Lazy morning. Tasty breakfast by Mom. Non-veg food for lunch (Had pomfrey fish after many years).

I was pissed off due to late train and the afternoon heat.

We were on the way to visit a newborn baby. (I was hesitant considering my infertility status). I am not jealous with the pregnancy or baby birth news. Yes but it does hurt and hauls me inside the infertility void. Moreover when I surely know that H would have a reason again to put a finger on me.

I wiped away the image of the newborn from my mind otherwise it would have left me scarred again.

Though I couldn’t get it out while I was folding the laundry and it consumed me. I was numb. I cried to myself. I folded hands and prayed and questioned all over again.

I closed my eyes to hear the question, “When will we have?” and I drowned in sleep as the tear trickled down the corner of my eyes.

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